a boy, a blog, a big deal
via img1.visualizeus.com
something i learned lately.

the world is a pretty big place. there’s lots of room, just ask someone who’s lonely.

if you believe in free will, then you believe in choice. and the most important choice you can make in everything you do is to decide if that thing you’re doing is filling this world with love or hate. the smallest of actions and the most important of decisions, all create varying amounts of love or hate.

you can take the pain the world gives you and bottle it up inside, you can pass it on to someone else, or you can let it go. if you don’t let it go, it will turn into hate - for yourself, your friends, your lovers, or your enemies.

anyone who considers themselves to be a good person usually considers themselves to be aware of their impact on the universe.

so while i strongly believe in the wisdom of sagan’s thoughts on the pale blue dot, and that in many ways what occurs in our lifetimes on the whole is insignificant, i still have to pause and wonder: “how could anyone take pride in being a hater?”

is it perhaps some sick way of pulling for the underdog? because when you ask google, you haters are losing. and i don’t see you catching up anytime soon.

and just because this was way more concise and eloquent when i was in the shower, let me really ruin this with a quote from a guy who knows a lot about hate.

drinkocracy

drinkocracy is a social / political structure, or if you’re less motivated, a drinking game.

drinkocracy is democracy, but you get a vote for each drink you’ve consumed. votes are to determine the next activity. the system works because drunk people suggest fun activities due to reduced inhibitions.

destructive testing

"The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears it is true." - J. Robert Oppenheimer

i work in a digital world and live in an analog one. in the digital world, you can create limitless copies of something, and manipulate each in a different way to see the result. in our world, every moment is unique and can not be cloned for the purpose of determining the best possible outcome via trial and error.

we make choices in real time and live in the result of those choices. the words you say, the actions you take, and the attitude with which you approach the world all irreversibly alter your life, and the lives of others, perpetually.

i know several people who say they live without regret, knowing full well that they are what they are because of this phenomena. while i imagine thinking this way is comforting, much like religion, i find it to be closed minded to a world of no longer possibilities and a greater understanding of how you got where you are and how the world became what it is.

the digital world has nurtured my inquisitive nature and habit of destructive testing. my inner drive to understand how things work often leads to me breaking them, but in the digital world the consequences of this are minimal.

in the our world, actions influence much more than nearly imaginary ones and zeros. they affect the lives of ourselves and others. unfortunately, my habit of destructive testing follows me into the world in which i live, and i have broken many great things that i wish i could have just accepted for what they were.

and so it begins.

this is my blog. there are many like it, but this one is mine.

ah, pop culture references, if i could speak entirely in them i would. i don’t, because that would be really hard, and if i’m anything it’s lazy.

how lazy you ask? well, i’ve had the resources and know-how to start this whole blogging thing ages ago. i could use the hosting i purchased, install wordpress or something, design a template, and all that.

so what held me back? content. what would i post? sure, i have the usual makings of blog content: a job, friends, opinions on everything from philosophy to technology to current events.

but who am i to feel that my experience is so unique, important, or interesting that it’s worthy of documenting for the world to see if they choose to? would i choose to post my inner most thoughts and feelings on a lamp post each evening on the way home from work?

of course not, that would be crazy. but do it on the internet and it’s normal. we live in the age of the network, and i’ve been involved in creating, maintaining, and using parts of that network most of my life. but before this, i really haven’t contributed much to that network. so why now?

the same reason i do most things. the same reason i do anything, a girl i know suggested it.

if i keep this blogging thing up, you will quickly catch on to this pattern of behavior. i’m nothing if not a creature of habit.